wHat gOes Up, mUst cOme dOwn!

Yes! This is the law of nature. And it goes for everything! The Earth, as we know, is not just a huge, inanimate hunk of mud, rock, ores, minerals, etc. that can spew out resources at whatever rate we wish for human purpose alone. It is not to be viewed as a storehouse of resources for us to extract, loot and dispose of. The Earth in fact is a complex organism. It is as living as each of us. It is a body having zillions of souls in it. Souls are nothing but energy. (And I don’t want you to behave ghostly too!) 

Alright, it all started with a recently watched webinar on ‘Shattering Your Financial Glass Ceilings’ by John Assaraf. A 6 hours webinar, highly effective for all those who are literally stuck with ‘concept Vs. reality’ phenomenon of life.

Well.. The title ‘Shattering Your Financial Glass Ceilings' suggests that there must be a golden formula to quantify our financial system. Well, it is not! There is no golden formula to quantify money exponentially. Growth is static, and not dynamic! Growth has limits, and is not limitless! No? Then think of a market which is already saturated. No? Okay. Think of a glass of water which is already full. Still No? Okay. Think of your age. Think of all those extinct species, the one who happened to be the part of this ecosystem, now just remained in dead fossil rocks & soils. There are some who would disagree with me, I know!

And, to them, the concept of money is ‘a factor of perpetual exponential growth’. Is it? Really? 

No. It is not. As because..  A concept is a concept is a concept.

Concept is nothing but a logical misfit into our mind; and is perpetual; and and happened to be rational.    
  

When it comes to the history of science, Newton was the best of all. Do you know why? It’s not because he attempted 10,000 different approaches to light a bulb. Not also because he was one of the person behind protecting the Holy Grail. (Well.. I don’t know if he was. I am just a great fan of Dan Brown.) And not also because he proved that Adam-Eve were as human as we all are; and NOT God’s gift to mankind! (Okay. This one is just a prank! Theists, please ignore.)

Newton was indeed a genius and best of all as because he stood on the shoulders of all giants. Amazed? Well.. I too was when heard about this for the very first time. One of the proven golden formula to be an effective executive is ‘Stand on the shoulders of giants’. (And we will discuss it in some other blog elaborately; let’s park it for that unknown day!)

Well.. We saw what is concept. Now we will explore what is reality.

Reality is irrational, emotional and very much human!! O c’mon, we are no machines. We are all humans. We are not human doings. We are human beings.

Okay. As we know, our brain is divided into two parts. Left side is the logical brain and right side is the emotional brain. And do you believe, if I say that about 90% (may be more) of life decisions are being taken by our right brain!! Aaawww!! That’s too emotional!! Isn’t it?? And you really dislike it. Isn’t it?? 

We all know, ‘Technology is the dawn of the dead’! Still we are embracing it.. That too very gracefully! And now you will find, build and give thousands of logical mis-fitting excuses to yourself (and to me too) that would create hundreds of self-created concepts and notions into your left brain. Back to tier one. We are human beings. And not human doings. We love to be ourselves. And not what should be done. The word 'should' is as fancy as one would dream about a holiday trip in moon! 

In a nutshell, concept is our mind (limitless). And reality is our body (with limits).  

And the law of nature holds good to all downturns of all Business types. What goes up must come down! Momentary of course! Though the momentum varies from one to the other...

fOrmuLa fOr haPPineSs!!

Alright.. Now that have my examinations got over.. Spending my leisure time in something awful been challenged by my inner peace. Henceforth, I chose the role of a self-proclaimed strategical analyst. 

Why? 

As because, joblessness revolt my self-esteem 360 degree baffled free. LOL! 
Nope.. That's not the reason.. Now I gotta time to be more thoughtful! At least for a month.. May be..!! Though the chances are always random and NOT 'non-random'!

Have you ever thought of where lies your pursuit of happiness?? 
Is that always the monetary benefits? Okay.. In that case, would it be for short-term or long-term? Where does your real break through lies?

What do you desire to become..?? 
To be Rich?? Or, happy??
To be the Wolf?? Or, an overpaid hick??
Well.. It's actually what you aspire to be!!

And.. This also reminds me of our (IBAians) first assignment of MS-I. The first assignment we had been encountered by was ~ "My definition of Happiness!"

Again, this was meant to cross-check our emotional stability & business acumen. And after collectively cribbing a lot to make that golden formula for happiness.. On one fine day, we, the 'know-alls', were literally dazzled by the finest statement made by our Professor. He stated ~ "Folks.. Happiness is positive cash flow statements!! " 

Nonetheless, random thoughts are intriguing my mind & soul these days very often.. Of course, with lots of anxiety attack! Suggested by a good friend, I started reading a book named, "Fooled By Randomness".. Yes! My vocabulary now has a new word called 'Randomness'. People, who knows my Quants Grade, please don't get faint! LOL

So.. As I started reading Part-I, I found it a bit tough to understand & realize the platitude of 'Randomness' in our daily life. Yes! I call it a platitude because most of us believe that there are formulas for every single thing we do.. Formulas for success, maximizing wealth, earning happiness, status, blah, blah & blah! Our mind doesn't bear the gap of uncertainty. Hence, it tends to find out patterns everywhere, with everyone and in every single thing!     

Am I confusing you? Don't be..
Think about your 'significant other' in that case. Or, studying any particular subject that has been a pain for long years! 
Some of us say, "I can't handle relationships!" Or, "It is not just my cup of tea.."
Why is that?? As because, we always tend to find & form patterns everywhere irrespective of the type, size & strength of variables. And what are these variables exactly??

For the 1st Case, these variables could be age, gender, region, language, culture, ethnicity, education, religious beliefs, blah, blah & blah! 

For the 2nd Case, these variables could be family background, education, environment, socio-economic background, political influence, religious views, blah, blah & blah! 

These variables set the moods & create/ hijack the emotions. Both positive & negative. 

So.. When we don't find a pattern with something, we curse god, ourselves & every possible variable that directly and/or indirectly is associated with the problem. We are so reluctant to adapt change. To accept change. To move on..

In this context, let me reflect upon the golden statement made by Solon (a Greek Legislator known for his dignity, reserve, upright morals, humility, frugality, wisdom, intelligence, and courage),

 "The observation of the numerous misfortunes that attend all conditions forbids us to grow insolent upon our present enjoyments or to admire a man's happiness that may yet, in course of time, suffer change. For the uncertain future has yet to come, with all variety of future; and him only to whom the divinity has (guaranteed) continued happiness until the end we may call happy."

 Yet to discover more.........

(to be continued...)

cRabs oF tHe saMe mOtheR!!

Ring! Ring! Ring!
"The person you're calling is busy. Please try after some time.."

(After an hour..)

Ring! Ring! Ring! Ring! Ring!
"The person you're calling is busy. Please try after some time.."

(After 3 hours..)

Riiiiiiii..................nnng! Ri.......iiiiii........ng!
"The number you've dialed is  unavailable. Please try after some time.."

(After 2 or 3 days..)

Ring.........!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"Hello.."
"You #$@^%&*%#@!$%&(^%$##@@@#####%^^$@@@^^&*&^%#@!"
"Okay.. Okay.. Wao!"
"Whaaaat??? You @^$@@*@@^*#&^$###@@$%^^&&%$$##@@@!!*##"
"Amazing..! Do it.. Oh Yeah...!"
(Faking around with a glorified smile)
"WTF..... You........... What are you upto???"
"There you go.. Love you.. I'm in office!!" (Internship Period)
And I continued bearing my fake smile even brighter.. And slowly and steadily moved out from the office floor. And she continued.. (Here, 'She' is 222!)
"You are such a ........... What were you doing 2 days back??? Why didn't you pick up my calls... You ^%$#&#@*"
"I was sleeping.. I told you many times, don't call me on weekends. That's the only time I sleep!"
"Awwwww... such a &%#!@%^&&%^&$#@@ you're!"
"Okay.. Okay.. Enough! Can we talk now?? Like humans??"

"Ohhh.. Ofcourse! I forgot that you're a human...!!!"
"Okayyyyy... Okayyyy.... I'm sorry.. Fine? Please lets talk calmly now.."
"Hmmmm... Tell.. What's NEWS???"
"What??"
"Whaaaat??? Do I have to tell you about WHAT?!"
"Ohhh... Yeah.. I got you.. Yeah.. They arrived.. too many.."
"How many?"
"mmmm...."
"Tell..."
"I don't remember... exactly.... mmm..."
"You say.. You don't remember.. Is it??"
"Okay.. That's it.. I don't know.."

And she continued hitting me with all possible lovely words which was literally seducing my inner peace to hell! 

But guys.. Anybody wondered.. What's going on??? Helloooo....  


Well... It was time for 'Hafta-de-hakuna-matata-reloaded' in style..!
Oh Yes! We were promoted to 2nd Year, i.e., the Final Year of PGDM course. We were seniors!!! And do you know what it feels like???

Yeah.. You got it exactly!

Yes! We became even more helpless! What?? Wait a second! Should I call it 'helplessness' or consider ourselves as 'glorified bullies' may be 'bitches' too!!   

Actually it was the combination of both! And that too irrespective of age, gender, caste & creed, blah blah & blah! IBA Bangalore is a mini Indiapura. So, basically we don't believe in diversity anyways! It's like 'All for one! & vice-versa..'

So, basically while some of our batch mates were planning to how exactly they would make a yummy-delicious-stupendous-fabulous-mamma-mia FISH curry.. Ahheemm.. I mean! Beat out the craps of 'Our JUNIORs' ( the buzz word with.. patent right.. matter of pride..)! Some were typically bearing an eagle's eye on them 24x7. But anyways.. All were having one universal motto.. "REVENGE" "SENIORISM" "GALS" & "GUYS".. OOopppss! Our Dream Gals & Dream Guys!!

You know.. the little innocent lamb types.. Afresh vegetables.. By default ready for peeling, chopping, slicing, dicing.. And..  By default prepared for cooking! And finally.. By default ready to be eaten up! Who wants A la carte man.. When you have the whole lot! A super exotic buffet.. Unlimited.. And.. For FREE!  

***I am sure this happens with every batches & in everywhere. All crabs belong to the same bucket! The Great Indian Crab Syndrome exists everywhere & at all levels.

But then.. Some are rare commodities! They are 'being/ pretended' Godfathers & Godmothers.. Even Soul Brothers & Soul Sisters..

Well.. I don't have any obligations with this category but the only thing is that nobody wants nonconformity.. Nobody wants to hear tantrums left, right & center.. Resist aloofness.. And man.. When it comes to peer evaluation.. Your grades go for a toss! Coz, now you are being entreated as so called 'Guardian Angel' of the little demons.. Who.. sooner or later.. Will become exactly the same crabs of the same mother! Got it? Good! 

 Alright.. After few months, I found that.. By default.. I was one among those rare commodities! And within few weeks I realized, I am totally fucked up! Why?? Let's quote this situation in style too!

"I don't often cry.. But when I do.. It's coz.. ANGELS ARE DESERVED TO DIE!"

Stop playing Angel.. Play Human.. Even better.. Play Devil sometimes! Corporate Life (C-Life).. Be it your B-School or Job life.. Humanism is the only option which you will have.. Please realize before its too late!

Although.. Sometimes it's too painful to eradicate the natural likings & feelings from within. But then.. We always have the choice! The choice is for long-term! But the worst part is being misunderstood at the first place.. Misconceptions.. Fights.. And above all unjustified expectations! And we all know the result.. Miss matched expectations causes anger.. And this takes us to a straight away roller costa ride to Kubler Ross!   

I have a weird belief though! And sometimes it works out well! I believe in anonymous relationships. Precisely, long term relationship with NO name! Coz, you know now that you can play better, safer & faster! No Kubler Ross! May be, less impacts though.. Sounds cool? Especially, if it's the outer world. It's been 6 odd years of Hostel Life now! From Kolkata to Bangalore. Life has taught numerous things! Some are constructive.. Likewise, some are destructive. Even self-destructive at times! To make a win-win (I - YOU), at first the first person has to win/ at least have a winning perspective. Rest are the intentions.. Intentions of the 1st person, 2nd person, 3rd party's influence, environment and above all their NEED and it's level!   

To read more about The Great Indian Crab Syndrome in upfront professional context, follow the link: http://chandra-kant.com/2012/04/13/who-is-to-blame-for-the-great-indian-crab-syndrome/

Anyone who challenges the prevailing orthodoxy finds himself silenced with surprising effectiveness. A genuinely unfashionable opinion is almost never given a fair hearing. — George Orwell 

cOloR mY cRiMe!

Embedded under the soil,
I concealed many sins everyday.
Nobody has seen, nobody has heard, nobody has felt,
The resonance of my voice, my anger, my agitation that I seeded all my way.

The grass looks always greener on the other side
But I believe I have enough sowed mine anyway!
Then also I always run after making those crimes,
which you called as insanity someway!

Is it my insanity or your fallacy?
Still you have dealt with no way!
And you presuppose my lost possessions
However I feel isolated and aghast to the mundane, 
shrieking my soul in most deadly way! 

(Firstly, don't get scared of this piece of write-up! This poem is based on a true story of a serial killer. I am not mentioning exact details out here. The poem reflects the Killer's revenge towards the so called civilized society, the law of justice which nailed & crucified an innocent's life in a very destructive manner. This is not subjected to any nation's context. Why I have written this? Okay.. It's my wish! Please treat this poem from the point of view of art & literature only. No ulterior intentions! )

P.S. Many commit the same crimes with a very different result. One bears a cross for his crime; another a crown! ~ Juvenal

FisH cUrRy iN FinAnCe cLaSs!!

'Japanese loves fresh fish!' ~ Anonymous.

It was the last day of our Corporate Finance Class in the Finance Lab. Everyone seemed to be extremely happy, as it was the time to say a final goodbye to 'Finance Lab'. No.. No.. Don't misunderstand me! We were happy not because it was the last class of Finance, but it was the last class of the 'finger-torture'! 

Oh Yes! Rightly heard..
What?! You still don't believe it?! Alright, feel the pathetic experience then..

What if, you've to sit in an IT lab for an hour or two, and you strictly are not allowed to move your head right/ left to see the neighbor sitting next to you even for a while, and if you do, then "Oh No my dear! You're not concentrating at all. What are you up to?"

And hello boss, though you know it well, you better don't dare to call it an IT lab, even if by mistake.. And if you do, then "Oh No! God should save you my dear!" 

Oh yes! If you anyway tries to cross check anything with any of the concerned person in the 'Finance (IT) Lab'... Then, "We all (means specifically you) are doing 'tamasha' (typical melodrama) here.. Oh No!"

I don't remember exactly how many times I heard 'Oh No!' in this entire Finance Session of my PGDM 1st year.. 
May be 10 times a day.. That means.. 
May be 40 times (4*10) a week... Which means..
May be 160 times (4*40) a month.. What!!!! 
Means.....
1920..... times... in my gawd damn 1st year!!!!

Hmmmm... 1920.. Thoughtful... And I used to think.. Why 'the phrase' everytime appears soo damn thrilling to me.. Now I got it!! Do you?? LOL

So.. The class started.. And we, as usual were praying to 'not' have a finger treatment for that day!! And.. For the 1st time in our entire Finance session.. God responded to us!

And Prof. asked ~ "Japanese loves Fresh Fish.. Why?" 

"Do I hear 'fff.....ish'!!!" ~ I sensed.. And almost all the heads turned to me and started laughing.

Okay.. For all those, who don't know me.. I'm a fish eater.. Big time.. In other words.. Whenever I hear 'fish'.. My mind rings a bell..!! (Remember.. Ivan Petrovich Pavlov's Experiment?!) Well.. It does happen with everyone with some or the other thing.. In my case, it is fish.. :P

And without thinking for a moment, I answered "everyone does!" in a sharp, loud and excited voice. And.. Then started repenting, as if 'why the hell did I respond..'!

Without wasting a minute.. Prof. pointed his finger to me and said, "Oh No my dear! You should come infront of the class and explain.. Why are you sitting there like a 'Brihaspati' (the omniscient)?? Come and explain quickly.."

And.. I was literally dumbstruck at that moment.. I mean, did he seriously want me to explain 'why anyone would prefer to have fresh fisshhh'??? Wicked!!!

So, I went to the podium.. Stood there for a while.. Maintained few minutes silence.. And spoke aloud, "I love fresh fish! And I have no idea why??!!" 

The whole class busted out in to laughter. Except the Prof. (who was annoyingly looking at me as if I had done any religious mischief & should be sued)!    

Suddenly, Prof. shouted at the class and said, "My dear.. You should do po-po to your batch mates, instead of doing pally pally with each other!"   

And the class became dead silent!

Again, I added, "I mean.. I don't like raving about my favorite cuisines.."

And now everyone (including the Prof.) busted out laughing in to tears!! 

"Oh No my dear.... You better go and sit at your place..!" he finally responded, anyhow managed his laughter. 

If you are thinking that 'What bullshit is this piece of write-up.. And.. What's in it for you!', then let me share with you an excellent case study on this very topic ~ "Japanese loves fresh fish!" Yes! Its a very well known and highly effective case study which inculcates not only the sense of strategy planning but also sets a well established paradigm in the process of productive thinking!

Let me first start with you the case problem:

Japanese loves fresh fish. However, the waters close to Japan have not held many fish for decades. So, to feed the Japanese population, fishing boats got bigger and went farther than ever. The farther the fishermen went, the longer it took to bring in the fish. If the return trip took more than a few days, the fish were not fresh. The Japanese did not like the taste. 

To solve this problem, fishing companies installed freezers on their boats. They would catch the fish and freeze them at sea. Freezers allowed the boats to go farther and stay longer.

However, the Japanese could taste the difference between fresh and frozen and they did not like frozen fish. The frozen fish brought a lower price.

So fishing companies installed fish tanks. They would catch the fish and stuff them in the tanks, fin to fin. After a little thrashing around, the fish stopped moving. They were tired and dull, but alive. Unfortunately, the Japanese could still taste the difference. Because the fish did not move for days, they lost their fresh-fish taste. The Japanese preferred the lively taste of fresh fish, not sluggish fish. 

So how did Japanese fishing companies solve this problem? How do they get fresh-tasting fish to Japan? If you would have consulting the fish industry, what you could have recommended?

Now, at this point, let me highlight an important fact over here.. As you have analyzed the severity of the problem with the Japanese and the fishing companies, what thoughts you have inculcated from this problem definition? 

Say, what if, you (the employee) is the fishing company here, and your Organization (the employer) is the Japanese people. Think!

Exactly same things happen inside any organization too! Let me share with you my personal experience in this context. As an Intern, when my immediate Boss used to ask me to do something, in a very particular fashion, by expecting some very specific outcome; sometimes either I fainted, or sometimes him. 

It was not because,
- I was incompetent!
- Or, my Boss was unable to communicate the objectives as well as his expectations properly!

As we know, every problem comes up with multiple solutions and ample number of approaches/ opportunities. But the sole factor remains constant ~ "What clicks when!!" i.e., what can be a relatively better solution/ approach for a very specific segment in a due course of time? 

3 things you need to ask yourself:
- Is the resource/ approach right?
- Is the time right?
- Is the place right? 

Again, for getting some more clarity, ask another 3 questions?
- What if, the resource/ approach is right, and not the time & venue? It is a full wastage of resources then. Isn't it?
- What if, the time is right to use that resource/ approach, but it is not fulfilling the segment requirements? It may lead to Customer/ Employer dissatisfaction. Isn't it?
- What if, the resource/ approach as per the segment requirements is aptly satisfying, but the time is not right, then? It may lead to create great chaos & conflicts, due to misinterpretation, causing serious damage. Time is money. Isn't it?    

If you analyze properly, resource/ approach remains constant for all the 3 cases. But it matters 'when' & 'where' you're using it. Isn't it?

Well.. How will you understand whether all of the 3 factors are perfectly feasible in one go? How will you interpret that? How will you analyze that?

-   Firstly, it starts with 'Analysis'. And NOT 'Analysis Paralysis'. I hope, if you know what I mean!
- Secondly, since analysis are highly objective in nature, you will get a heap of information. Hence, you really need to be clear with the objectives, mission & vision (in broader sense).
- Thirdly, the 'Interpretation' part. Interpretations are highly subjective in nature. Hence, a clear knowledge of the problem definition & objectives will help you out the way you're expecting the outcomes to be.  


Enough gyan! Let's now see how the Japanese Fishing Companies finally coped up from this situation.

To keep the fish tasting fresh, the Japanese Fishing Companies still put the fish in the tanks. But now they add a small shark to each tank. The shark eats a few fish, but most of the fish arrive in a very lively state. The fish are challenged.

This also, portrays a very fascinating side of facing the day-to-day life challenges & to develop our own strategic moves. And, learning from the mistakes, & never repeating. Also, failures are only the feedback, a real success counts from great failures!

Yes! Challenges and ability to face those challenges makes us ALIVE. It's always the survival of the fittest. No free lunch! 

Now when I sit in any IT Lab. I miss my Finance (IT) sessions, where 'finger torture' beats & reshapes us so well to survive rather win any challenging finger treatment in any phase of our C-life! Funny. But we have learnt the lessons in such freaking ways!

"Man thrives, oddly enough, only in the presence of a challenging environment." ~ L. Ron Hubbard